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“How
to Develop Self-Confidence
In Speech and Manner” eBook Online Version
It is possible to take life too seriously and to blunt one's abilities by too constant use of them. The worker, however earnest and ambitious, should not overlook the law of action and reaction which runs through all nature. The flow and ebb of the tide, the rise and fall of the fountain, the alternating of day and night, remind us of this principle of work and play that should characterize a man's life.
It is easy to grovel. Men sometimes become so intent upon their work that they lose sight of the wonders all about them. The artist finds it necessary to stand off from his picture every little while in order that he may observe the proper effect of light and shade, of perspective and proportion. When a man turns his thoughts for a time entirely away from his regular work, he returns to it with renewed energy and clearness of vision.
It is an inspiration upon a clear night to stand and survey the stars as they seem to sing together. Here is music and mystery to satisfy the longing soul. There is no haste, no confusion, no discord, but a silent symphony of the skies. And the more intently we look the nearer they seem to come, until at length we appear to dwell among them. The lives of many men are like the wonderful stars, pouring down on us, as Phillips Brooks says, "the calm light of their bright and faithful being, up to which we look, and out of which we gather the deepest calm and courage."
Men are often possessed by their possessions. A Turkish wrestler, sailing from America toward his home, turned all his money into gold, placed it in a belt, and wrapped it around him for safe-keeping. By some irony of fate, the ship was wrecked, and the weight of the gold carried him more swiftly to his watery grave. When a man's possessions are a burden to him, he is not well off. Not how much, but how good and how useful, should be the criterion from which to judge what a man has. What end does it serve always to be coveting the things that are not ours, while neglecting to use what we have? Is it not better to own a Bible and a Shakespeare that we have read than a whole library of books with uncut leaves? A few years ago a book called "The Simple Life" had an immense circulation. It struck a responsive chord in thousands of lives. Men were feeling the strain and the responsibility of over-accumulation, of too many of this world's goods, and this appeal on behalf of simplicity profoundly impressed them.
The pursuit of money is still intense. Probably the most difficult and unsatisfactory way to obtain it is to aim at it directly. We know a successful man who seldom thinks of money. His theory is that by devoting his time and energies to good work the financial results will take care of themselves. For over ten years he has persistently followed this plan and not once has he been without an abundance. His joy in his work is incomparably greater than that of the man who is merely money mad. Happy is the man who has found out early in life that the accumulation of money for its own sake is not a worthy ambition.
If you have books, read them; if you have friendships, strengthen them; if you have money, use it intelligently; if you have time, spend it wisely; if you have talents, cultivate them. Men often achieve greatness through turning small things to great account. "Not failure, but low-aim, is crime," says Lowell.
When a distinguished musician was complimented upon his apparently natural genius, he replied: "Ah, but you do not know with what difficulty this ease has been acquired." Sir Joshua Eeynolds was asked how long it had taken him to paint a certain picture. "All my life," he answered. The man who makes the best of his talent is constantly building reserve power. Such a man was Webster. In the great debate with Hayne, when he was suddenly thrown upon his own resources, he incorporated into his speech material that was prepared long before and had been reposing in his desk. Modesty does not mean weakness and self-effacement. It is one of the supreme qualities of manhood. It dislikes sham and pretense. It is an enemy to all that is unreal. It quickly recognizes truth and sincerity, but is quick to condemn the mean and false. Montaigne said: "The only thing I fear, is fear." The courageous man is at a premium, but the wibbly-wobbly person has always been and ever ill be in disfavor. The world awards its prizes to men of firmness and self-reliance. Fear has forged more chains for men than iron links have ever done. To see the best side of life is more a matter of habit than of heredity. A man has a sense of personal uplift when he shows sincere appreciation toward others. Like mercy, "it blesseth him that gives, and him that receives." A man's world is governed by his likes and dislikes, and what he looks for that he invariably finds. We should be eager to possess the great qualities of mind and heart that lift some men above the common crowd. And if we think as we should of our friends, we shall have no time for bitterness toward our foes.
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