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“How
to Develop Self-Confidence
In Speech and Manner” eBook Online Version
"When a young man has formed this very important and productive habit of deciding things definitely and of doing his work without feverish haste, but in a thorough, straightforward and honest manner, there is no high intellectual destiny to which he may not aspire. Whether he has new ideas or whether he sees old questions from a new point of view, he is going to harbor these ideas in his thoughts during eight or ten years of steady work. They will gradually become surrounded by hundreds of similes and comparisons and likenesses hidden to others, which will become organized and nourish the original ideas until they have grown strong and powerful. And just as great trees spring from acorns, so from such thoughts, fostered by one's attention for many years, there will be put forth powerful books, which will be to honest souls in their struggle against evil what clarions are sounding the charge to soldiers, or else these thoughts will become concrete and will express themselves in a beautiful, harmonious life of uprightness and generous activity."*
* '' The Education of the Will,'' Jules Payot. Funk & Wagnalls Company, 1910.
To no one is a strong will more essential than to the public speaker. Wendell Phillips had this power in high degree. The more an audience refused to listen to him, the greater was his determination to compel them. This gift it was that made him '' an American patriot, a modern son of liberty, with a soul as firm and as true as was ever consecrated to unselfish duty, pleading with the American conscience for the chained and speechless victims of American inhumanity."
As an instance of ready courage, supported by a strong will, it is related of John Hunter, a celebrated surgeon of his day, that he found pleasure and relaxation in studying the habits and instincts of animals. Two leopards that he had kept chained broke loose one day and entering the yard were surrounded by a number of dogs. Aroused by the barking of the dogs, Dr. Hunter rushed into the yard, laid hold of the leopards, and took them back to their den. Then, in reflecting on the risk he had incurred, he became so agitated that he was on the point of fainting. During the reign of James II, Sir John Cochrane became a prisoner. At that time the mail between Edinburgh and London was conveyed in saddle bags by a mounted rider. Cochrane's daughter, knowing the time when a warrant for her father's execution was expected, attired herself in men's clothes, and, armed and mounted, waited at a lonely spot between Berwick and Belford until the carrier with the mail-bag containing the death warrant approached. Confronting him with pistols, she induced him promptly to relinquish his bag. A second warrant was then sent for, but it was seized as was the other by the heroic girl. By this time Sir John's father, through influence and bribery, had secured a pardon from the King. If one's motive be strong enough, one may attempt almost anything, however difficult and dangerous, and if the will be firm and resolute, may hope to achieve it.
Chapter III
THE CURE OF SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS
Daily speech offers one of the vast opportunities for eliminating self-consciousness. The student should aim here to develop definiteness of idea, sincerity of expression, and concentration of mind. Nothing leads so quickly to hesitation and embarrassment in a speaker as mental uncertainty. To speak confidently, he must not guess, or imagine, or take for granted: he must know. Lack of proper mental equipment is responsible for a large part of the fearfulness of men. One who really knows whereof he speaks, and is absolutely sure of it, is likely to be sure of himself. It manifests itself in his voice, his use of words, his manner, and his entire personality.
The speaker should cultivate sincerity in his conversation. He will avoid formal compliments and empty platitudes. He will not talk like a book. He will not talk for talking's sake. He will speak for a purpose, and this will enable him easily to concentrate his mind upon the subject of his conversation. He will listen attentively and interestedly to others. Above all, he will not speak of himself unless obliged to do so, and then briefly, modestly, and gently.
In what manner, then, shall he speak" Newman's definition of a gentleman here rings in our ears: '' He guards against unseasonable allusions or topics which may irritate; he is seldom prominent in conversation, and never wearisome. He makes light of favors when he does them, and seems to be receiving when he is conferring. He never speaks of himself except when compelled, never defends himself by a mere retort; he has no ears for slander or gossip, is scrupulous in imputing motives to those who interfere with him, and interprets everything for the best."
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